This is Day 200 of the Green in 365 series! Woo-hoo!Β
Less Stuff! Better Life! That is the mantra of the simple living and minimalist community that seems to be growing in popularity around the web and blogosphere.
And our family believes it, we just don’t live it very well.
My husband and I have been lamenting lately about how much stuff we have accumulated over the past 4 years of living in this house. We got rid of around half of our stuff when moving out of our old house and into this one, and we are continually getting rid of stuff through garage sales, selling on Craigstlist and Facebook, and donating to thrift stores and charities. We’ve had a garage sale every summer since we moved here, and taking everything that didn’t sell straight to the thrift store, and we are always amazed that we continue to find more and more things that we would sell or donate.
Somehow we continue to just accumulate stuff. And the weight of it all is bearing down on us and becoming overwhelming lately, to the point that it’s definitely having a negative impact on our lives.
So, I’ve been reading a few ebooks, and browsing several minimalist blogs and catching the fever to purge our house and our lives of all this STUFF!
Here’s the Top 10 Reasons Why Our Family Wants to Live with Less Stuff:
1. Messy House
This is one of the most obvious outward effects of having too much stuff. Our house just gets messy and overwhelming so, so easily. The laundry hampers are overflowing, there are toys always scattered all over the floor, the kitchen counters in our already small kitchen are cluttered, and our dining room table is almost always covered with stuff.
You may not notice too much if you’re just standing inside our front door, but it’s hiding in the back rooms and closets, the upstairs room and basement. It’s frustrating, overwhelming and embarrassing.
2. Lost Stuff
When you have a lot of stuff, it’s hard to keep track of it all. If you’re going to have a lot of stuff, you’ll have to be one of those super organized people who can manage it all and put it all away in it’s proper place all. the. time.
My family is NOT made up of super organized people. And so, we lose our stuff. We lose important papers, keys, sunglasses, shoes, our phones, and plenty of other things that it really shouldn’t be that difficult to find and keep track of.
3. Waste of Time
I was thinking the other day about how much time I waste on our family’s stuff. It really is maddening. I mean, I’m already a busy lady – I have three small kids and work from home. I don’t have a lot of time to be wasted, especially on stupid stuff.
Obviously you waste time when you’ve lost something that you need and you have to take the time to look for it, but I also waste my time on stuff in ways like:
- moving something that I don’t know where to put it from one place to another – like from the dining table to the bookshelf – and then back again.
- moving stuff just so I can clean – I can’t vaccuum, dust, mop, clean the kitchen, etc. when the surfaces are covered with stuff.
- spending more time than is truly necessary on a chore, like laundry, or washing dishes, or cleaning the kitchen, simply because there’s too much stuff.
- cleaning up a pile of stuff that has fallen over – only to put all the stuff back into the toppling pile, because I don’t know where else to put it.
- moving stuff around so I can have a place to prepare meals, cook, eat dinner, fold laundry, etc.
It’s so aggravating to me, because every time our stuff keeps me from doing what I really should be doing, or want to be doing, it wastes my time.
4. Overwhelming
When I look around my house, I don’t see a peaceful place for our family to have fun and connect with each other. I see STUFF. I see stuff that needs to be picked up. I see stuff that’s in my way so I can’t do something I want to do. I see stuff that I just don’t know what to do with. I see stuff that needs to be moved so I can actually clean. I see stuff that we just don’t need but for some reason haven’t gotten rid of. And all of this stuff is completely overwhelming to me, and that is at least part of the reason I haven’t done anything about it until now.
5. Bad Example
Full honest disclosure here: I feel like such a hypocrite and terrible mom when I tell my kids to clean up their toys, their room, their clothes and then yell at them when they whine or complain or don’t do what I asked. My kid’s stuff is totally overwhelming and frustrating to me too.
But really, how can I expect them to take care of their stuff when I’m not setting a good example of taking care of my stuff? This is not the way that I want them to grow up, and not the example I want to teach them!
6. Waste of Money
I cannot begin to count all of the ways that having too much stuff wastes money. Buying things we don’t really need or use wastes money. Buying things we already have, but can’t find, wastes our money. Paying late fees because we lost a bill is a waste of money. And even that our kitchen counters are covered with stuff so I don’t feel like cooking and we eat out too often, wastes our money. We’re so tired of wasting money on stuff when we know it’s not necessary and we’re already living on a tight budget.
7. Stressful
All of this: messy house, wasted money, lost stuff, and wasted time is just stressful. Plain and simple.
8.Β It’s Embarrassing.
It’s hard to have people over to your house when it’s so cluttered and messy with stuff. If you do, you clean the main areas of the house and pray they don’t look into your bedroom, or hall closet, or open the door to the upstairs. And if someone does happen to just stop by, well, then it’s uncomfortably embarrassing. You feel like you should apologize, but any excuse you can think of is completely inadequate. You can’t just blow it off as a “busy weekend”. This stuff’s been around for much longer than a weekend!
9. Steals Joy
Being stressed out and overwhelmed, without feeling like there’s a light at the end of the tunnel, or not knowing how we can dig ourselves out from under this stuff, takes away some of the joy of living. Our culture feeds us a terrible lie that more stuff will bring us more happiness, more joy. But it’s not true! Too much stuff steals our joy.
10. Less Margin
When stuff steals our joy, and wastes our time, it takes away the margin in our lives for doing things we really want to do. Stuff takes away the space for life-giving activities and relationships.
Instead of spending time reading, a long-time love of mine, I have to spend my “free” time cleaning, picking up and organizing our stuff. Instead of investing my time and energy into a hobby or building relationships with friends and family, I’m spending my time with my stuff, which is a fateful companion.
This is just me, and our family, and how we’ve been feeling in regards to our stuff. To some people, we may not have so much stuff; we live in a small house, with a small yard, and our three kids share a room – how much stuff can we even have? But for us, the amount of stuff has gotten out of hand to the point where we can’t sit by and not do something about it. And so the journey to less stuff and more life begins! Will you join with us?
How do you feel about the amount of stuff your family has? Is your stuff adding to your life, or taking away from it? Which reason to get rid of stuff do you connect with the most? Or do you have another reason to get rid of stuff that’s a big motivator for you?
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This. Oh my goodness, this. We’re in the process of clearing our entire house of things we either don’t love or need. It’s tough, but each time a space frees up I want to sing and dance for joy!
It’s amazing how much stuff we have that we just really don’t need, isn’t it! I’ve been working on cleaning out my kitchen, and it’s making me rethink things all around the house. I wish I had more hours in the day to go through everything RIGHT NOW, because I’m SO motivated to just get rid of it all!!
I totally agree with all of this! We’re moving right now so it’s even more clear to me how much junk we have. I’m just not that good with getting rid of things and really good at buying things! π My hope is that when we move I will start with only the bare essentials and try to get rid of things I see we don’t need. Like if it’s sitting in a box in the garage unpacked and I don’t even miss it I should get rid of it! Anyway, great post! Off to pack!
Good luck with the move Krissa! We got rid of so much stuff before we moved into our current house. But watch out! The stuff has a way of creeping back in over time! π
~Emily
I could have written this post myslef I look at my house and wonder WHY do I have this stuff we have started to get rid of things and OH do I know what you mean about moving piles I move this to here to get to that and that to there to get to this. I think tonight was just my night to get a little extra boost from reading blog posts thank you so much I feel JUST LIKE YOU. I can’t wait to get rid of STUFF
Good luck as you get started on your journey to less stuff Crystal! Be sure to come back because I’ll be posting and updating our progress and experience and I hope it can be motivating and encouraging to others!
~Emily
Thank you thank you thank you! I needed to read this! My house is SO VERY MUCH CLUTTERED and I know we need to get rid of it all because it does steal so much from us. I’ve fund myself getting very overwhelmed and upset a the mess lately but at the same time I can’t seem to part with it. One day at a time!
One thing that’s been helping me get rid of stuff is asking myself when the last time was that I ACTUALLY used the item. If it’s been in the last six months, I’ve been moving it to the basement to see if I miss having it in my living space – the answer is most likely to be no, but I’m not ready to just give it up and move it out permanently yet. If the answer is a year or longer, it’s easier for me to get rid of it because I realize that I just really don’t need it, and it doesn’t deserve to take up space in my home in a way that is just stressful and overwhelming to me. Stuff shouldn’t have that kind of power over us! I agree, one day at a time! It might be a slow journey, but it is still so worth it!
~Emily
A very wise friend said to me “You don’t have stuff, stuff has you”, and it’s true. It rules your life if you let it.
I’m 64 years old, and I believe that you spend the first 2/3rd’s of your life getting stuff, and the last 1/3 trying to get rid of it………only nobody wants it!! Need versus want. Bring one thing in, send another to the thrift store.
Such good advice Bonnie! Thank you for sharing!
~Emily
I feel exactly how you feel! I’ve been trying to declutter, but with six people in our home it isn’t easy. My husband works long hours and my youngest child doesn’t sleep by herself, night or day, or entertain herself when she’s awake. I want to relax and enjoy her infancy, but my house full of stuff is relentlessly overwhelming and discouraging. I’m. So. Tired.
I’m sorry K! I know how you feel! π It can be so hard to get started – one thing I’ve realized is that even if I put two or three things in the giveaway pile at a time, it makes a difference and makes me feel better and helps to keep me motivated. When I’m picking up toys, or putting things away in the kitchen, if I see something and say, “I don’t want to keep this anymore.” Then I move it to the bin we put on our porch to hold all the stuff we’re getting rid of. It might not be much, but it’s a good start! I hope that helps!
~Emily
Thanks for the encouragement! We just returned from a week of camping, during which time we (of course) survived without 99% of our stuff, so that was refreshing. I will keep on keeping on. =o)
I agree with this 100%! I’ve felt this way for quite some time, and feel like it’s a constant process of getting rid of stuff, and somehow we still have too much stuff. We definitely want to simplify our lives by really considering what things are necessary and useful, and what things are a waste of time, energy and space. We recently made a big move and currently don’t have a lot of extra space for stuff – and I’m so thankful for that! We’ve decided that we really don’t need more stuff than what can fit in our home with us (ie: no extra storage unit or anything like that). So when we moved, we got rid of a ton of stuff. Then when we went through everything that was temporarily in a garage for storage, we got rid of a ton of stuff. Then we went through our home and got rid of a ton of stuff. Then we did a challenge in may to get rid of 7 items everyday for the month of May, and got rid of a ton of stuff (and easily 7 items or more every single day). I just don’t know where all of this came from – we’ve never thought of ourselves as having an excessive amount of stuff, but I think we just realized suddenly that we really don’t need so much of what we have – and that we shouldn’t be sentimental about stuff either. It’s just stuff, and it can’t come with us when we die. We don’t need the stuff, in order to have the memories, or the people we love.
Thanks for sharing your story Elaina! I love the challenge to get rid of 7 things every day for a month! That is a lot of stuff! I’m sure your experience will be an encouragement to others!
~Emily
Oh. My. Goodness. Yes! You just said everything I’ve been feeling for a LONG time. I keep trying to do purges but I just have not been successful at getting us where we want to be. Please keep us updated on your progress so maybe we can figure this out together! Thank you so much for sharing this, it’s so nice to know I’m not alone here. BLESS YOU for those photos! I always feel like I’m the only one!
Thanks Ellie! It was a little embarrassing to post those pictures, but I figured it it helped one person not feel so bad about their house, it would be worth it. It’s always good to know that we’re not alone, isn’t it?!
~Emily
Oh, and I also meant to say that I will definitely be posting on our process and progress. Maybe not for a little while because I have other stuff already planned, but definitely check back. I have loved hearing from everyone about their desire to simplify and I really think that we can help and encourage one another on our journeys! So I’m trying to figure out the best way to do that as a part of the blog! Also, you can follow my page on Facebook because I’ll be posting updates and pictures there too, probably sooner and more often then I will here on the blog, at least for now.
Thanks!
~Emily
*Every* word of this. I NEED to declutter and simplify and I barely know how to start. I’d like to have a garage sale but it seems kinda scary, I’ve never done one. A few of those little shelf brackets broke in our kitchen cabinets and I cleaned out one cabinet and was astonished at all the stuff in there.
I think the realization and acceptance that we have too much stuff is the best place to start! I would designate a big tote or box somewhere easily accessible, but out of the way, like in your basement, as your garage sale box. Put everything in there that you no longer want, and vow that you won’t bring it back into the house. Then once you’ve gathered enough stuff, you can have a sale. Or just donate it – it’s a faster way to get it out of your house, and it doesn’t really take much extra time or effort the way a garage sale does. Hope that helps you get started!
~Emily
It’s like you’re reading my mind. I struggle with this SO MUCH. I’m sending this to my husband immediately!!
I’m so glad this was helpful for you BeckyKay!
I love this post and agree with all of it! My husband, however, does not agree, which makes it tough for me to do and, more importantly for me, help him understand why all our STUFF overwhelms me. π
Hi Jodie,
It’s so hard when you have a husband that’s not on board! Maybe you could put some of your stuff from your main living areas – like kitchen, living room, dining room, and bedroom, that you don’t think you need into a bin and store it in a lesser used part of the house, like your basement. Then you wouldn’t actually be getting rid of the stuff, but it would help your living areas to be less cluttered, and hopefully help you to feel less overwhelmed. If your husband can see how much better things can be with less stuff around (and maybe that you don’t actually need all the stuff after all), he’ll be more likely to get on board with you. One thing I’m realizing is that just because something is a kitchen gadget, or bathroom item, doesn’t mean it has to be stored there all the time. If it’s just taking up space and creating clutter because I don’t really use it, but I’m not sure I want to get rid of it yet, then it can live in the basement for awhile while I decide. It doesn’t have to make my life more stresseful and overwhelming by living in the space where I’m “supposed” to use it. I hope that helps!
~Emily
I seriously thought it was just me who had a house that looks like this and the piles that just remain piles because where do they go? I cut down on our stuff majorly last year, but after a few months I realized we still have way too much.
So looking forward to more of this, I definitely need help an encouragement on where to begin, since I already got rid of all the easy to get rid of stuff!
I say regularly that it would be so much easier if I could just get rid of ALL of it rather than pick what stays and what goes!
I’m so glad you can relate Abigail! It’s so good to know we’re not alone!
It is hard to chose what stays and what goes. Every time I declutter, I find things I decided I should keep for one reason or another during my last declutter session, and now I think “Why in the world did I keep this?!” Sometime we just need a little time to know that we are really ready to let stuff go!
If you haven’t already, be sure to follow my Facebook page, I’ll be posting updates there more often as I work on this decluttering and simplifying journey!
~Emily
I remember reading somewhere about a woman who had a fire start in her upstairs and actually hesitated to call 911 because of the mess in her upstairs…she was embarrassed for anyone to see. That made such an impact on me…showed me that I needed to take charge of our stuff and bring it under control because I could actually understand what she was thinking. Thank you for your wonderful post and sharing personal things. It makes the rest of us feel better!
It’s somewhat refreshing to know that there are people like me out there π I so wish to have a less cluttered house but something always seems to get in the way of getting things organized, thrown out, sold or donated. I always chalked it up to my husband and I being hedonists. We would both rather do something fun than clean out the cluttered basement or storage areas, or our closet… And I am always telling my son to pick up his toys, clean his room, put his clothes away…. How can I expect him to be neat when both of his parents are slobs? Well, this past weekend we actually cleared out living space in the basement where we can sit and relax and be with our little family. The feeling of accomplishment is enough to get us to keep doing this with the other rooms in the house. I hope this momentum keeps us going. I don’t thing our garbage men will appreciate us for the next few months π
I cleaned up the kitchen pantry last week and found out that I had see stocked up stuff that has passed the expiration. It was an eye opener. And when I was done with purging and de-cluttering I ended up having two empty shelves! Oh, the bliss of cleaning π
I could share my photo to you as an encouragement; as yours would look so much cleaner, lol π Thanksfor this post, it really was a blessing to me π Over the years the things yuo have shared here have been made clear to me. You are so right, is a continual battle and you have to watch out. I want to be my faith to show in my home, so it must be more peaceful=less stuff! π Haha! thanks again π
YES! This is what I am talking about; I’m so tired of all the “junk”. I’m dreading Christmas because I know we will get more stuff than we need. Going into 2014 I am starting clean, no junk, no extra, only what we need. I’m so glad I am not the only one who feels this way. I look forward to reading more on your blog.
You really described me to a T…moving piles and things from one place to another because you don’t have a place to put them! Livingroom, kitchen, bedroom, and the basement is already full! No wonder we’re so stressed out. I started to do some decluttering a few weeks before Christmas, but then there was, well, Christmas, and guests, and more “stuff” got moved to the basement again to make room. And that’s where it has stayed. It’s been too cold since then to work in the basement, and until it gets decluttered there’s nowhere to put the other “stuff” from the bedroom or kitchen, etc. What’s worse, our food pantry is down there, too. The shelves are full and the cans and cartons are starting to get piled on top of other surfaces. I have another shelf unit, but can’t find room for it or even to put it together! It’s frustrating. But, spring will arrive eventually, and I’ll get back to purging the basement “storage room”. Then I can move on to other rooms in the house one by one.
Mary, sometimes it feels all too overwhelming, doesn’t it? But there is something you can do on a regular basis that helps. This is what I do: I joined my local Freecycle group and I post things I want to give away. The great thing about Freecycle is that people post things they want, usually on one particular day a week. I’m always on the lookout for what people want & hope that I have that item. When I make contact, I always try to give them something else on my list. If it is something kid-related, I’ll say, do you need soccer cleats, a winter coat, etc? Or I’ll just go down my list: do you need pint jars, wicker baskets, Pokemon Tupperware, etc.
I also keep an eye on the wanted section on my local Craigslist. Also, post things on the Free section. When I’ve sold good quality jeans, I’ve asked, would you like a bag of free tshirts to go with that?
If you have towels, sheets or blankets that are getting worn, your local animal shelter would be happy to take them. Or ask your vet. My vet is happy to take worn comforters, although I’ve taken in too many rescue dogs and need them myself.
The rule I’ve made for me is no clothing item unless at least the same number or more leaves the house. Ask teenagers & spouse to do the same.
Good luck, I’m still working on my kitchen counters!
Oh my word I’ve jist come across this and it TOTALLY is where I am with our house atm. My hubhy isn’t quite at the same pointvyet which makes it exrra frustrating but your post has given me yet more resolve to properly deal with all our junk once and for all:-)
I’m so glad it was an inspiration to you! Thanks for stopping by!
~Emily
Thanks:-)
Hi Emily,
Thank you for writing this! It is great to know that I am not alone in this clutter nightmare! Thanks for sharing the pictures, too. I want to get it all done NOW and lose motivation when it takes so long. I do like the idea of getting rid of 7 things a day. That is a keeper. I mean a tosser, hahaha!
Thanks again for the motivation!
Woah, you just said a mouthful in your article. I can FEEL the stress and passion in your words. The first thing I would do for you is sit you down for a cup of seda-tea (mild sedative tea -chamomile, carnip, or lemon balm) and let you know you aew not alone and it is totally doable!! (: I totally hear you about the weight and pressurw STUFF causes and even people unknowingly pressuring you to have MORE (parents, grandparents, friends etc). It’s a LOT to deal with. You just gotta go against the flow. And as you know a whole movement is rising up rebelling against societies greed for MORE. To put it simply, from now on the motto is…Less is more! (: Less stuff, more LIFE, more PEACE! (: We are on day 1 without toys and it has been nothing short of miraculous! (:
*catnip tea (oops spelling error)
Love this post! I too find clutter causes stress and steels peace & joy. I started reevaluating what we own, need & buy a few years ago. In fact a few times I went a bit too far in purging and wished I had not gotten rid of a few things. But the good thing about that it I’ve learned what we truly do and do not need. Living with less stuff is still a work in progress, especially since my husband doesn’t exactly get or agree with my vision. But he is not the one has to make space for and dust his enormous DVD collection (afterall there is Netflix and such). Anyway it’s a compromise. But since I started reducing and minimizing I feel less overwhelmed and more peaceful.
I did the same thing! Moved in 2009 and got rid of half my stuff. Then moved again 6 months later and got rid of half of what I had left.Then in January of 2014, got rid of half of what was left again. Now, November 2104, going through everything AGAIN and getting rid of half of my stuff. And the funny thing is that since January of 2009, I haven’t bought anything to add to my home. I just have had that much “stuff”. I don’t need it, I just wanted it. I, too want to live the life of minimalism. So, as my kids tell me lately, “Mama, the house looks so empty!” Ahhh, how good that sounds!
I have noticed that moving house multiple times has really turned me into a minimalist! I do a big cull every time I move & I’ve gotten into the habit of doing smaller ones regularly. Things that I had a sentimental attachment to a month ago is suddenly fine to throw out a month later.
Great post! I am resolving to simplify my life in 2015, and your post put to paper several of my thoughts and feelings. Thanks!
So trying to do this right now. At one time I had it under control, when was this? Now trying to just organize stuf that belongs to others, hard to do. If it was my stuff, most would leave this house. Very over whelming. Every year, I would get rid of things, no one would touch, and it worked. My daughter moved her stuff in, but not herself. Lots of stuff. Someone told me for every year you get behind, it takes three to catch up. Truth. Over whelmed. So glad to see this site.
It as if you just looked in our house. Everything you wrote about is how I feel every day. Thank you for this post.
It’s so good to know we’re not alone, isn’t it!!
My family is moving at the end of the year and I think that’s the exactly time for us to declutter and minimize our stuff. Your article is great and the 10 reasons are indeed serious and reasonable, and I think every responsible man or woman nowadays should take them as his/hers and clean their homes and minds. Thank you for sharing your reasons!
Thank you for this article. I feel EXACTLY the same way. My husband and I moved into this house almost three years ago and although we have gotten rid of a lot of things, it still isn’t enough. We have been learning from all of this though. We are learning to say no, which we found out we are not the best at. Anytime that someone passes away the first thought anybody has is, “Oh they will probably have kids one day. Let’s give it to them,” or, “They have empty rooms in their house. They must need more.” Anyway, we are learning to say no to these people who mean well, but in the meantime we are also learning to get the stuff out. The KonMari method definitely has helped us, but I am so overwhelmed with the miscellaneous and sentimental categories, especially since the extra stuff that I have is from relatives who have passed away. Again, thanks for the article. I really appreciate your honesty and not sugar coating it.